i won't send this, and you will never see it. it's been months of perpetual loss, intentional loss. i'm trying my best to give a shit, but
idon'tgivea. things got complex, complicated, misunderstood, decayed - our good government. i never loved you - and never will, i'll spend my whole life trying. my words cheapen and depreciate; my weakening sight, my battered flank - all spent and ready to surrender. i'm in this myself - withstanding stinging bits of shrapnel and debris, shitting myself. i don't hate, i avoid, hate is too strong, avoidance is too hard. (remember) my non hate, careful and calculated avoidance. people are everywhere. in every open space and every dark and unsuspecting corner, you will find them, keeping me up with cackling (unforgiving leech). i can't sleep at night, the unending crack of light peering into my closed eye, eight hour burst of life, and consequent, subsequent hours of non living. a live of non living, a tumultuous, unwanted praise, a dimly lit cave, my
thisway. stand up and pay for your sins.
